Monday, September 1, 2008

Where I am now

We survived last week.

Barely.

Friday evening I collapsed in the arms of my two little girls and husband and cried. I've never appreciated a three-day weekend more.

I'm almost at a loss for words now. Numb, cautiously optimistic that this week will prove to be better.

By Friday, Liana was soaring without me. But, she was never the one I was worried about. I knew she'd thrive. She's a social butterfly ... someone who seriously needs to be around other people to feel her best.

She didn't even cry when I left Friday morning.

But, Jadyn ... she's a whole other story and just the thought of what I knew she was going through last week can send me spiraling down, again.

Still, she showed an ever-so-slight improvement Friday by not crying as long, and even played for most of the day. She still cried at pick up. She still didn't eat lunch -- but neither did all week. She was still so relieved to get back into her parents' arms. It didn't help that she picked up a small cold or something, too, but her weekend was all out of whack with what we believe was some night terrors and up several times a night wanting daddy, no mommy, no daddy. Helpless, knowing her pain, we did as she requested.

I'm sure tonight she'll sleep well and then the week will start all over again.

On a side note, both girls are talking non-stop now and it's so neat to witness it.

Highlights of this milestone:

In bed one night this weekend. The room was dark and we were doing our nightly petting hours. Liana said, "Daddy! I have gas."

Then, today at lunch:

Daddy: "Do you like grapes?" (Asked to Liana while she was eating almonds but preparing to eat a grape.)

Liana: "Yes." Pause. "I like nuts, too."

Thanks to everyone who has been trying to console me this past week. I do appreciate all of your kind words. I'm just going to let this play out for a while and see how it goes. There may be few postings in the meantime. Or, not ... you just never know.

"D




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6 comments:

justagirl said...

I am so glad you got through the week, I have been thinking about you wondering how things were going.

Don't they say the cutest things at that age.

Hang in there...

Katherine

Danielle said...

I think I'm living in a parallel world to yours. My 2 year-old girls just started daycare too (only three mornings a week though, so not nearly as intense), and just about all of your thoughts and reactions could be mine. I have found such comfort in your writing. Knowing someone else is mounting this challenge too, and knowing that she loves her girls just as much. I'm finally seeing a light at the end of our tunnel. Still intense tears at drop-off, but a good day on Friday left me with so much hope. Tentative hope for today, but hope just the same. I wish you so much strength in this mother of all transitions. We can do it!!

InTheFastLane said...

transitions are so hard. And if it is hard for us as adults, it is understandable that little ones might have a hard time too. I hope this week goes better for all of you.

LauraC said...

So glad things improved over the week! Alex is very shy while Nate is very outgoing and it's been such a blessing to have them together in new situations. Nate leads the way and Alex follows behind a few days later.

Shelli said...

Oh, my heart twists for you. I'm so glad you survived the week. I had a hard time leaving my son in the church nursery for an hour! He's so shy he just stays seated and watches all the other kids.

Carey said...

It will get better. My daughter punished me too for a while...when I took the new job. It was awful! But they get used to it and you make up for it by doing "mommy and daughters special days/trips" Someone suggested letting them pick something to go do. Jelly often picks ice cream or the library...they feel good that they got to pick something special to do with mommy.