Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Perfection. Possible or not?

One can only imagine what Zen Priest Momma Zen would say about the issue of perfection. I'm sure she's addressed it. I'm know she's struggled with it herself as a mother to Georgia.

We all strive for it, even if the results are far, far away from being perfect.

What she would say to this post is you are what you are. Today is your best day. This is the year that was. All of her sound bites ring in my ears as I try and convince my girls to eat dinner, when I can't calm their incessant tantrums or bring peace over the precious wanted toy they are fighting over, and after I've lost my lid and, gulp, yelled and feel like I've just ruined their lives.

Last week was one of those weeks when the best I could do was get up in the morning and force a smile. Each day stacked up on top of each day and each was worse than the rest. If misery loves company I can't understand why we were so alone all week.

But, something beautiful happened (as it always does in Shawn's World) mid week: I read a blog post that affected me like I've never been affected. It spoke to me with special murmurs that only someone who truly understands the trenches of motherhood and life could. It gave me permission to let go of the countless worries that had begun consuming my mind, again.

The post grabbed my hand, led me in and offered the biggest, warmest hug I've gotten since being a mother. And I cried as each word passed my eyes. The more I read, the harder I cried.

And then it was over. Just like that. And so were the tears. So were the fits of rage. So were the can'ts, the don'ts, the doubts, and the millions of mistakes. I was more patient with myself afterwards. I was more patient with my miserable, cranky girls. I was more patient with my life.

I thought it was just me being some crazy blogging chick, again, but as I read my way around my corner of the blogosphere, I realized that others had been touched, too. They were printing it out -- as I had. They were moved beyond words and brought comfort by the steaming cupful.

To reach people in such a way, to me, is perfection. For a post to bring ME to tears means something extraordinary because I do not let them fall easily.

And, that is why I am awarding Karen with a perfect post award for her post The Parent's Little List of Trust. More of these awards can be read by visiting Lindsay and Kimberly. This is my first time participating.

It seems like yesterday when I Googled Karen's name in search of other moms who had read her book. Little did I know that I would find her. That we would connect in this vast world of words and images and emotions. That she would become a dear blogging friend. And, for that, I am so thankful.

Thank you for visiting today.

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Anonymous said...

Let me thank you in broad daylight. Perfection is this: a cold, dark morning, first one up, coffee and breakfast to make, dog to feed, child to dress, no help, no thanks, no company, no break, and then you knock on my door with this cinnamon roll, and we share it together.

InTheFastLane said...

Such is the power of words. What a great gift when words can lift us up and move us in that way.

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