Sunday, May 6, 2007

I AM a good, Mama! I am!

Dear girls,

A bizarre request has popped up at Girl's Gone Child and I can't help but to participate and send all of our readers to some of the great posts that are included in Rebecca's list.

I read Rebecca's blog often, but not as frequently as I should. She is a gal who will tell it like it is and there aren't enough of us out there in the world.

But, this request is for Moms everywhere to proclaim their greatness, instead of their weaknesses.

This brings me to a story I've wanted to tell you for some time now. About your first year. About how difficult it was for me. Sleep deprivation is a real mood killer. Two crying babies, another downer. I will not ever lie, it was dreadful.

But, recently, I looked back at the photos. I took so many. And, I realized that we did have lots of great moments that year. You were smiling. There are even some photographs of me smiling.

That's when I realized that I not only survived it, but I think I did the best I could do. When you were still waking a couple times a night at 6, 8, 10 months, I didn't let you cry just so I could get some sleep. (Neither did The Da!)

When you refused bottle after bottle because of reflux, or whatever, I didn't just let you suffer. We propped you up for 30 minutes after every feeding until you were 7 months old, we gave you medicine to ease the pain, we fed you more often than average to help keep the liquid light on your tummy. All of this meant less sleep, less downtime.

I read books to you even though you couldn't have cared less.

I held you as much as possible, even though that's really hard to do when you are by yourself with two babies.

I could go on and on saying how great of a mother I was that first year despite the challenges. But, I think we all know that the real issue is now and I think I'm excelling at being your mom now.

When you throw a fit, instead of ignoring you, I hug you. Instead of deciding which of you is at fault in a daily squabble, I make sure you both know that that kind of treatment of each other will not be tolerated. We are always doing new activities, and playing hard with toys or non-toys.

Being a Mama is not easy. It's very hard work. But, I'm good at it and I think it is exactly what I was meant to be.

So, thank you, girls, for bringing me to my full potential.

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